I've taken this title from Sally Coleman's Eternal Echos blog as it feels very appropriate to carry on the thoughts about family, especially after the week we've had here.
Tabi started at a local college 3 weeks ago and we are going through the transitions of new life, new boundaries and how it all works out. Both her and I handled an situation really badly at the beginning of the week and are learning and growing through it all. Learning new areas of trust, how to show trust and how to behave so you are trusted - on both sides, how to communicate, how to put in safeguards and how to work together for a situation where everyone feels heard and safe.
And it is all about realizing that she is no longer a child, though still not an adult and that the protection of the love of her family, and of course the love for Ben too, who at 18 is also going through his own stuff. But because no matter what mistakes we make these two young people are surrounded by the love of their family - namely myself and growing more so Ian, their stepdad.
After having conversations with various police officers, parents, college tutors, etc I can see how live has changed for our young people. Yes it is great that they do have laws in place to protect them too, but often this then confuses the whole role of family, what the parents feel they can and cannot do. Again it gives the whole rights without responsibilities. And yet, I feel when the protection of the children comes from the love of their families - and in the context Sally uses it is the Jewish families of Jesus' day so it was extended family - there is a chance for the children to develop responsibilities for their future too.
And yes I do think we need things in place for those children who do not have loving caring supportive families, but not so that the parents of those who are cared for feel disempowered.
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