At the moment many of my friends and myself are saying how much we preferred it when our children were younger and we were more in control, could make all the decisions and even if they answered back we just made them go anyway, even if they kicked and screamed a bit. Ok this could be a bit of a rose-tinted glasses but its how we feel.
Anyway I was pondering this one someone said about how when one hears something from God one should take it to someone more mature and let them ok it. Now I have heard this before and also seen leaders question something because they didn't get it. I am also seeing friends with their teenagers very much holding on to that control, pushing them in a certain direction, still holding control. I am also seeing it with my own on not being willing to take on financial control of their lives and not wanting to mature in that area, and of how I so want to keep control.
Someone at the 24/7 conference said about how we can only teach and show and disciple but be willing to let them make mistakes rather than control them so they don't make mistakes.
But I wonder how often to keep church things going we do not let people mature properly, we keep them always having to check things out and if it doesn't fit with what the leader says then they are told either not to do it, or that it wasn't of God, or they didn't hear properly. So that in the end we have a church full of people who do not step out.
Perhaps both with our children and our spiritual children we do need to stand back a bit and be there, as I think often God is, to pick up the pieces. Actually this is interesting that God does not control us, gives us total free will and then Jesus came and died for us to restore us to God, and even when we accept Jesus still we are free to come and go as we want, and yet still God is always there for us - no control and always will to restore us and pick up the pieces.
I hear what your saying about letting people make mistakes, I think that is important but maybe the checking out part is what we need to model differently. I think it is good to run an idea past someone, asking for input and guidance but then after listening to that advice people have to be allowed to make their own decisions. it is not good to hold onto control and I have seen much abuse of that, but even leaders should check things out, get a different perspective, after all we are a body and need to work together, not individual be empires
ReplyDelete